Friendshift, You Say?

I recently coined the word "Friendshift."

What is friendshift, you say?

I'm so glad you asked.

Friend-shift is what happens when your friend-ships, well, shift. As the EFT practitioners are fond of saying, "Shift Happens." Anything that doesn't grow will die, so shift is a wonderful thing when you consider the alternative.

You may have noticed that throughout your life, friends have come and gone. Sometimes you lose touch with someone because you move away (or they do). Perhaps you had a good buddy at work, but either your or the buddy no longer works there, and work may have been what bonded you together. Maybe it's a hobby that you no longer have, or a habit you no longer indulge. Whatever it may be, without the common denominator, the friendship may dissolve completely.

The same phenomenon can occur with divorces. The awkwardness of feeling like you have to take sides, or choose one friend, or not invite both former partners to outings or parties...you know what I'm talking about here.

In my own life, I've seen couples that we were friends with -- not so much as individuals, but as a couple...and when teh marriage dissolves, it seems we really don't have much in common with one person or the other. So the friendship (you guessed it) shifts.

You may have a buddy from "the good ol' days" and it seems one of you has moved on to bigger and better things, and one of you is still trying to create the good ol days. That can really cause two people to drift apart, and have nothing in common going forward.

Perhaps your old buddy has taken on a new, destructive lifestyle, that you simply can't bear to watch (or encourage).

Sometimes, your relationships don't dissolve completely, but they shift into something more, or something less.

Understand that, regardless of the reason or the type of friendshift, this is really neither a "good" or a "bad" thing. It just is what it is.

I once heard that friends come into our lives in a certain time, in a certain way, because there is something both parties need from the relationship. Once that need is met (or dissipated), the relationship has served its purpose and usually dissolves. Perhaps neither person could grow if the stagnant relationship continued. Who can say?

But it can be sad to say good-bye to a friend who is no longer needed...or who no longer needs you.

However, it is importnat to realize that when one friend disappears from your life, it leaves room for another.

Perhaps there is someone you lost touch with years ago, and your paths may cross unexpectedly. You may find that although your lives have gone in completely different direcitons (or not) that you still share a tremendous amount in common. This leaves room for the old friendship to develop into a new friendship (friendshift).

Don't be surprised if you find yourself wondering "what ever happened to..." and lo and behold, you find a surprise email from them, or a Christmas card, or a phone message.

And don't be afraid to look up an old buddy to see how their lives have changed since you parted...and share your new experiences as well. On the flip side, don't be afraid to end a friendship that needs to be ended. Don't let social graces or long-standing relationships stand in the way of personal progress (yours or theirs). If the relationship isn't serving either of you, it's time for a friendshift.

Authentic conversations can open the door for current friendships to friendshift to a new, more intimate level. Supporting and challenging each other to strive harder, to reach higher and to become more amazing individuals.

Your question today:
What friendship deserves a friendshift in your life? ARe you willing to make that difficult phone call or schedule that tough meeting with them today? What's holding you back? Will either of you grow to your fullest potential if you DON'T make a move?

Wine, Whine and Why'n

Seems to me that the intake of significant amounts of wine can have one of three effects.

First, some people get funnier after they drink a lot of wine. And if I drink a lot, they tend to get better looking, too.

Second, some people get really whiny with wine. Which annoys me. So I normally don't drink with people like this. (Hey, just being honest here.)

Finally, some people get into what I like to call "Why'n." In other words, they get extremely philosophical. They wonder "why" about a lot of things that they may not otherwise consider. These are the most interesting to drink with.

Personally, I do a lot of why'n when I'm sober too. It's fun, it's interesting and it beats the crap out of watching mindless television.

The greatest thinkers in all of history enjoyed a good why'n session. (With or without wine.) If they hadn't, there's a lot of stuff we wouldn't even have today.

Of course, you must be careful not to spend TOO much time Why'n. Otherwise, you become one of those annoying pondering pontificators who are all talk and no action. And we all know Action Does It, so don't bother why'n if you're not going to back it up with some real action.

Tis the season for setting New YEar's Resolutions. How did last year's work out for you? Did you accomplish all of your goals, or did you fall short from lack of action?

Why not make 2006 the best year of your life so far?

Here's your question of the day:

What have you been wanting to do, for a really, really long time, that you are NOW finally ready to take action and accomplish?

Now that's a resolution worth keeping.

The Power of Choice

Successful people know the power of their own choices. I recently saw a quote that said "The choices you make will dictate the life you live." Powerful stuff.

There is not a doubt in my mind that my choice to pack up my family and move to Colorado is absolutely, unequivocally the best choice for me at this time, in this place.

New Orleans is still a wreck.

And if you thought the attitude and work ethic was bad pre-Katrina, you should really see it now. $10 an hour plus $125 a week bonus to work at McDonald's adn you STILL get attitude and crappy service.

YEah, it's going to be a long, LONG, L O N G time before this city gets back on its feet. God bless those who choose to stick around. I know I'm better suited to the environment, the weather, adn the good people of Colorado.

And something I didn't expect has happened this week. I got terribly, horribly homesick this week. For Colorado. YEah, that is definitely what I call "home" now.

And I'm looking forward to returning home with a decided heart that this was certainly the best possible choice for me and my family.

So whatever you choose, know that you have the power to choose and may you live long and prosper with the result of your choices.

HEre's your question:
Are you able to rest easy with the choices you've made in your life that have carried you to this point? What choices do you need to forgive yourself for making? Remember that at any given moment, you did the best you could with the information and resources that you had at the time.

Fire. Good.

What is it about campfire and wine that creates a safe environment for authentic discussions? Some of the most powerful conversations I've had and insights into the minds of others have occurred during campfire chats.

Perhaps that's the secret Roosevelt knew when he created his "fireside chats."

The bold colors in teh flames and the mesmerizing trance of its flickering beauty, the golden glow of the coals and the firefly dancing of the rising and whirling sparks...who can resist the allure of an outdoor fire?

Not I, said the fly.

Cold and damp outdoors, but warm and toasty by the fire. Have you tried roasted coconut marshmallows? Mmmmmmmmmm, delightful.

Fire can symbolize so many things. Destruction. Creation. Power. Rebirth. Cleansing. Purifying. Electrifying.

What creates fire in your life? Truly, what is the spark that lights your flame of passion? and I'm not just talking sexuality here. What are you truly passionate about?

HEre's teh steps to success and happiness:
1. Figure out your passion.
2. Set goals ignited by passion.
3. Take steps, make choices, and make decisions that move you closer to those goals.

That's it! The rest is just details.

Your question of the day? See above. And step #1.

Well, what are you waiting for?

What's Your Birth Order?

I realized something the other day about first-borns and last-borns. And it's nothing you'll read about in Kevin Leman's Birth Order Book.

First borns take everything said at face value. They're quite trusting in that way. Last borns tend to think everyone is either joking or being sarcastic. We last-borns tend to say things like, "No way!" and "Are you serious?" and "Are you kidding me?" and "Get out!" whenever we hear something that we don't already know to be a fact.

I may have figured out why that is.

It happened at a recent family function, when my sister believed something silly I told her as a joke. I was thinking "she is as gullible as Andy" (my husband). He always believes whta people say (for the most part), and often misses tongue-in-cheek humor completely because of that.

On the other hand, I tend to use all those disbelief phrases I mentioned above.

Here's my theory:

The first-born child gets most of their early information from their parents or primary caregiver. They're getting all their info straight from adults. They have no reason to question what is told to them, so they take everything at face value and expect it to be true.

On the other hand...

we last-born children have older siblings who like to pull our chains. And everynoe is alwys joking around with us, poking fun, trying to see what silly thing they can get us to say or do. So as adults, we think everyone is treating us in the same manner - even if we're "supposed" to believe them, like if it's something our boss is telling us, or a police officer, for example, we will most likely respond with "REally?" or "Are you serious?"

Think about it....

and in the meantime, here's a question to REALLY make you think:

What does any of this have to do with success?

Merry Christmas to All

Merry Christmas.

May your holiday season be sprinkled with success and good cheer.

May your expectations be set appropriately, to avoid the "after-Christmas blues"

May your gifts be plentiful and right-on-target (or may your returns be swift, painless and on sale!)

Merry Christmas and Happy (1st night of) Hanukkah.

God bless!!!

Who Loves A Christmas Story?

I've never met a man, woman or child who watched A Christmas Story and didn't bust a gut laughing about it. You may think it's actually called "You'll Shoot Your Eye Out." Success knows when to take a break and laugh at our own silly folly, and the Christmas season is a great time to do just that.

Every year, TNT (or a similar channel) floods its airwaves with repeat showing of this classic movie.

This year, instead of spending 2 hours watching this classic flick for the umpteenth time, why not catch the 30-second version here?

Enjoy! (and don't shoot your eye out)

Oh, I almost forgot your question:
How's your Christmas season going so far? If you didn't answer "perfectly," there's still time to create the Christmas you want...go for it!

Merry Christmas!

The Allure of Fire

I don't know about you, but I love fire.

It's magnetic allure, it's mystical draw, it's magestic, awesome power...somehow, they seem to surpass time adn space. There's nothing quite like sitting in comfortable quiet near a raging fire on a starlit evening, and being alone with your thoughts...or with no thoughts at all.

Staring at the burning embers, watching the lights put on a fantastic display. Wondering why it's so captivating. Looking around at our companions (or lack thereof) and seeing the same wonder and distant looks on their faces as well. Looking up at the night sky and wondering if there really is intelligent life out there.

Feeling the warm glow on your face and hands, while your backside feels the chill of hte damp night air.

Yeah, few feelings can compare to this. In some ways, a fire enjoyed in this manner can surpass the benefits of a one-hour massage or even an intense journaling session.

Fire has mesmerized human beings since it's first discovery, and adults adn children alike continue to be drawn into it's colorful splendor.

I love fire.

When is the last time you enjoyed a campfire? Whether it's outdoors or in your own fireplace, a fire can calm your soul and smooth the edges of a rough day like no food or spirit can. Chimineas and fire pits have made it safer and easier than ever to enjoy a good, safe fire in the comfort of your own backyard. And the effects are ever so calming...we successful people deserve some come respite, don't we?

So your question of the day is this:
Where does your mind go when you get lost in the burning embers of a good fire? Do you dream impossible dreams? Do you wallow in regret? What can you take away from your last great fireside experience and how can you use it to enhance your life?

New Orleans is Still a Wreck

Wow.

I can't believe how bad it still is here. I am sooooooo glad we chose to move.

The destruction - even months after Hurricane Katrina's wake - is still astronomical.

"Blue roofs" (tarps) everywhere you turn...so many less tress...so many trailers everywhere. Restaurants close at 8PM. Sure, the bars stay open later (but that's no place for a toddler - even in Louisiana!) It's really overwhelming.

I'm not one to turn tail and run, but I have learned that success knows when to cut its losses. Success must always do what is best for itself in order to maintain success.

Sometimes that means painful changes. Sometimes that means leaving our home town. Sometimes that means facing the unknown.

Looking around this place of desolation, where Christmas decor is sparse and moods are low (even at this most festive of times), I know I made the choice that was right for me.

But it's not always easy.

Here's your question:

In your life, when have you taken the tough road above the easy way out? How has it impacted your life? What decision are you now faced with that deserves a tough answer?

Travelin' Home for Christmas

This is a totally new experience for me. I've lived in New Orleans my entire life, along with nearly all of my family, up until a couple of months ago. Hurricane Katrina prompted me to uproot my family and move far from Hurricane Alley. I mean, I used to live about 7 minutes from my parents!

So this is the very first time I am experiencing the whole "coming home for Christmas" thing.

It's strange.
It's new to me.
It's exciting!

So far, I like it...the anticipation....calling Mom to see if she's making our family favorite dishes (which of course she is). And for an added bonus, ALL my siblings will be together for hte first time at Christmas in at least 10 years.

Yes, our families create a lot of drama in our lives, but only if we let them.

In fact, we can choose what kind of Christmas we will have. Just like we choose what kind of day we'll have, every single day. Know what I mean?

Sure you do.

I'll keep this short, since today is a travel day for me.

But here is your holiday question of the day:

What would change if you could be a little more understanding, a little more patient with some of your more "challenging" family members? How would that change the feel of the holiday, for everyone in your inner circle? Think about it...and have a great day.

More 3AM Wisdom

I don't know if it's the holidays or what, but I am finding myself here again, up at 3AM and sitting in front of my computer. What's up with that?

Not one to waste time, I am busily plowing through the day's to-do list, crossing off items in a whirlwind of activity. Amazing how much you can get done in one hour when the house is completely silent. Of course, it helps that I'm not likely to get phone calls or emails in teh middle of the night as well!

And yet I know that I'll be able to fall fast asleep after completing a solid hour of my tasks for the day. I'll start the day so far ahead, a nap is not totally out of hte question.

You know that old Ben Franklin definition of insanity, don't you?

The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.

Yeah, well I've decided to do something different.

We leave town on Wednesday, to return to New Orleans and spend Christmastime with my family for a little over a week. Instead of frantically scrambling at the last minute (as we are prone to do when traveling), I have diligently planned ahead. So far, the only items left undone are those that were delegated to my husband.

No, no, this isn't one of THOSE kinds of postings. I am not a fan of "spouse-bashing" so you won't find anything like that here or in any of my other blogs. I mean, consider the alternatives?

I could play the martyr and try to do everything myself, so that I don't have to rely on the hubby to procrastinate or forget something.

I could nag him for not getting things done early, like I had the good foresight to do.

Nah,I don't like either of those alternatives.

Successful people know what to delegate, to whom and how often to follow up. You've got to yield some control, otherwise you end up a stressed out control freak, miserable and frustrated. (More about how to overcome your control freakishness here.)

The best thing you can do in any relationship is just do what makes you happy. You worry about YOU - and let the other person worry about them.

I know, it sounds contrary to what our society pushes, doesn't it? Always wanting us to put other people first....well, maybe I'll write more about that in a later post. For now, just suffice with this: are you happiest when you are nagging someone else about what they are NOT doing, or when you are personally taking action to get something done? Yeah, I thought so.

As I was saying, you've got to learn to let go a little bit if you want to maintain your own sanity. This was a tough lesson for me to learn.

So about this packing....

I pulled all the clothing, shoes, etc that I am bringing, plus everything for our toddler, and it's all ready to be packed. The husband is pulling his stuff in the AM and I'm getting packed a full 20 hours (or so) before we leave town. This will be a new record for us!

Sure, we don't have a catsitter arranged yet, but I'm not worried about it. I've delegated that to my partner (husband) and I know he'll take care of it. If I know it will get done, does it really matter whether he arranges it a week in advance, or calls our neighbor while we're on our way to the airport. Nah, if I think that matters, I'm only kidding myself and it would stem from some underlying need I had to control things again.

It's hard to tell if this is making any sense, since it's 3AMish right now.

All I know is that I was tired of arguing before every trip (especially since we travel a dozen or so times per year) so I decided to do something different, with the expectation that I will get different results.

I'll let you know how it turns out.

Oh, I almost forgot, here is your ??? of the day:
Where in your life are you pleading insanity by doing the same thing over and over again and expecting differnt results? Are you willing to try something different today?

Our Reasons Weaken Us

As you may know, I am in the middle of the Money Beyond Belief EFT tapping series by Dr. Joe Vitale and Brad Yates. In the recording I listened to yesterday, Brad said something that really made sense to me.

Have you ever experienced that moment when you you catch the line in a song, or a phrase uttered, or a quote from a book, and you get a moment of unmistakable clarity?

Well, this statement hit me like a lightning bolt.

Brad said "our reasons weaken us."

I was stunned. Actually, I had to stop the playback and think about that statement for a few minutes, to marvel at the truth within it.

Specifically, he was talking about refusing unhealthy food. That seems to come up a lot around this time of year. People are always pushing sweets on you, right? Oh, go on, one little cookie won't hurt. And we tend to succumb, we make the weakening choice, for any number of reasons.

Maybe we don't want to attract attention to the fact that we're on a diet.
Maybe we don't want to hurt the feelings of hte person who baked it.
Maybe we don't know how to say no politely.
Maybe we want to fit in.
Who knows? Any number of reasons can justify a weakening moment.

Brad went on to say that when we DO insist on saying no, we usually feel like we have to give a reason.

No thank you, I'm dieting.
No thanks, I'm diabetic.
No thanks, I'm trying to cut back on sweets.
No thanks, I just ate.
No thanks, I'm full.
No thanks, it's not on my eating plan.
No thnaks, I'm trying to fit into a dress for New Year's.
Etc.

His point was that our reasons are totally unncessary. Yet we feel we have to give a reason, we have to explain our point of view, or our reasons for making the choices we make.

I agree, that is pretty disempowering.

I've witnessed this myself. What I mean is, I've tried it both ways: If I refuse something that's offered (sweets or otherwise) with a reason...that typically only opens the door to a conversation whwere I feel I must create more reasons and justifications.

For example:
No thanks, I'm on a diet.
(other person:) Oh, really? What diet? Yeah, I tried that one and it didn't work for me.
Now I'm in a position where I feel like I have to justify why I like this particular eating plan.

Really, who wants to talk about diets when there are so many tempting foods lying around???

On the other hand, I've done it this way too:

No, thanks.
(other person:) Really? Are you sure? They're really good.
I'm sure they are! But I'm fine, thank you.

Once or twice I may have gotten a peculiar look from the person, but it's only for a moment and then the conversation turns to more delightful topics.

And it is SO liberating not to have to explain yourself!

Right now, I am reading Power vs. Force and this same concept is prevalent thorughout the book. Power stands strong, confident in its choices and decisions, whereas Force feels like it has to justify, rationalize and "win over" the other person.

What a difference, eh? (Excuse the "eh" but after all, we DID just return from Canada, eh?)

When we give reasons for our actions, it weakens us because we are putting the power in someone else's hands. We are looking for acceptance when we rationalize.

Sure there are some times when you should provide reasons. For example, when you are asked why? you should typically give your reasons. The interesting thing is that most people are so wrapped up in themselves -- in their own reasons and justifications -- that they seldom ask another person "why?"

Maybe that's why I get such strange looks when I ask people "why" they think like they do. They're not accustomed to someone showing so much interest in them!

You will be asked WHY in certain circumstances: when you're on trial...when you're confronted about situations related to your job...when your spouse asks you why you did or said somehting, perhaps. But in routine, day-to-day conversations, people are entirely to self-involved to dig into your why.

So don't feel like you have to give a reason. Just make your choice, period.

And always look for the hidden option which allows you to choose NOT to participate:

Would you like chocolate or vanilla?

Neither for me, thank you.

Your question for today is this:
During the rest of today, can you make 3 choices and express these WITHOUT giving a reason for your choice?

Good luck...and let me know how it goes!

More of the Same?

In keeping with our gratitude theme of late, I ran across this quote and thought I'd share it with you:

"Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow."

Melody Beattie
Author

Your question of the day is this:
Are you willing to spend more time in Gratitude mode than you are in Need mode? Until you are, expect more of the same.

Success Shows Appreciation

This isn't hte first tiem we've talked about gratitude in this forum, but I've got a different angle for you this time.

When is the last time you stopped and took a few minutes to appreciate nature?

Abundance and beauty are all around us - and it never ceases to amaze me. My latest favorite is the moon. Every night, in the middle of the night, I can see the moon smiling down at me through my bedroom window. It's amazing how bright the moon is here in Colorado. Why is that?

Are we closer to the moon becasue of altitude? Is it because the trees are shorter than the houses where we live? Is it becuase there are no signs and billboards, blocking out the magestic moon? Who knows. Who cares, I just love it.

The moonlight is so bright here, you could literally read by it. I am not exaggerating.

So maybe where you live, the moon is not as lovely. But maybe you have stunning waterfalls. Or shimmering lakes. Or towering trees. Or magical mountains. Or lush green valleys. Or sparkling snow. Or sultry bayous. Or scenic byways.

The point is not what you have or don't have, the point is to be able to see the beauty in whatever you see.

Success always takes time to stop and appreciate the environment, nature, and all the blessings that surround us.

Your question of hte day:
What can you appreciate right now, today? Will you take a few minutes today to thank the Universe for sending such abundant gifts, and focus on a feeling of gratitude?

The Power of Creation

HAve you ever noticed that while you are creating, it's hard to focus on anything else?

For example, if you enjoy photography, it's kind of hard to think about anything NOT related to photography while you're creating photographs. There's too many factors that keep you in the moment - how's my light meter? How can I improve the composition of this image? what other angles can I try? How far away am I from my target? How's my focus? What F-stop should I use? If I wait long enough, will that bird look right at me? Do I need to clean my lens? Did I bring fresh batteries? A million thoughts enter our minds, but all are related to the task at hand, and only that.

While you're creating, it's easy to temporarily forget bills, worries, relationship troubles, and anything else that would otherwise occupy your mind during idle time.

So the next time you get bummed about somthing, why not create?

Creation takes many forms - just think about something you love to do. Do you love to:

write? imagine? draw? sew? bead? design web pages or graphic art? speak? tell stories? scrapbook? cook? shop? put together outfits? play with your kids? take pictures? paint? arrange flowers? assemble jigsaw puzzles? create memories?

Whatever you love to do that CREATES, why not go for it? We are creative beings and we were born to create. When is the last time you created soemthing, just for the pure pleasure of doing so?

AT this time of year, wrapping gifts is a perfect diversion. It's pretty hard to think about anything else while you're wrapping something. Christmas cards work well too (you still have a little time!)

Your question today is:
What can YOU create today?

Do You Read What I Read?

Have you read Conversations with God by Neale Donald Walsh? If not, I suggest you stop what you are doing, get on Amazon.com and treat yourself to this all-important book.

YEah, it's that important.

You know, I typically have 3 or 4 books by my bedside at any given moment. Usually, right before I go to sleep, I pick up whichever one strikes my fancy at that point, adn start reading wherever I left off. (Yeah, I get a lot of bookmarks as gifts!)

It never ceases to amaze me that whatever problem, whatever question is on my mind, just so happens to have the answer in whichever book I pick up that evening (provided I go with my intuition on which book to pick up, and not get in my own way).

Have you ever experienced that?

The ability to follow your intuition is certainly a characteristic of success.

So here's my question for you today:

Where do you get your best guidance? A friend? Meditation? Books? The Bible? and are you relying on that source to help you with whatever problem is currently plaguing you today? If not, WHY the heck not?

Going Home for Christmas

HAving lived in New Orleans my entire life (until most recently), this is the first time I've had the unique opportunity to experience what it means to "go home for Christmas."

Sure, Colorado is our new home, but New Orleans will always hold a special place in my heart. Besides, most of my family is still there.

For the first time in at least a decade, our entire family will be together at Christmas. Sure, it'll be in a slightly altered house (my folks still have a "blue roof special" which is Hurricane Katrina-talk for "tarp covering teh holes in the roof"). Since their roof is asbestos, no one will touch it...well, that and hte fact that there are just no roofers available right now!

But it won't matter, because we'll all be together. And my darling little girl is finally old enough to open presents on her own, and get excited when she sees a reindeer (even a plastic one, or one that lights up or espectially one that moves its head) and Santa Claus and Christmas tress, and all that jazz.

What about you? are you going home for Christmas?

Here's your question of the day:
Who deserves to hear from you (personally, I'm not talking Christmas card cop-out, or email) this year? Why not give them a call or drop by today? I'll bet they'd looooooove to hear from you....

3AM Wisdom

Do you ever wake up in the middle of the night for no good reason whatsoever?

That happened to me this morning. Yep, around 3AM. No noise, no bad dreams, no worries, just wide awake.

They say if you can't get back to sleep within 20 minutes, you might as well get up and walk around. Apparently if you can't fall asleep again within 20 minutes, it's gonna be awhile. Probably because that's when the "Oh my gosh, why can't I fall asleep? I have a lot to do tomorrow, I gotta fall asleep right now!" Which doesn't exactly help to bring on the peaceful state of slumber...

So I did what the so-called experts say, and I got up after 20 minutes. Decided to go into my office and see what's shakin. Hey, you can ge ta lot done at 3AM when you're focused, did you know that?

No phone ringing, no laundry to do, no toddler wanting attention. Even the cats were looking at me like, hey, what are you doing up?

I put in a solid, uninterrupted hour of work, and then I went back to bed. Nice!

I went back to bed feeling a huge sense of accomplishment, and I even slept until 9! Of course, when I woke up, I felt great because I had shaved some items off my to-do list already. It's like that old saying about "we do more by 9AM than most people do all day." Well, maybe not quite that impressive, but still, I was pleased.

After all, I could have hit the kitchen for a snack (which wouldn't have accomplished anything NOR would it have made me feel better) and then plopped down in front of hte television. Any idea what's on at 3AM? My guess is nothing good!

But I didnt' do eiehter of those things - I took massive action towards my goals, and NOTHING feels as good as that does. Even at 3AM! No, especially at 3AM!

So here's my question of the day:
When you wake up in the middle of hte night, what do you do? Do you do something productive, or do you turn on the boob tube and hit the fridge? Do you realize it's completely your choice, either way?

Angels Aren't Real, Are They?

Do you believe in angels?

For most people, unless they've had some type of encounter with an angel, they typically don't believe that angels are real.

Now, when I use the word "encounter" I'm not necessarily talking about seeing an angel live and in person, or hearing the voice of an angel. There are millions of other ways to "encounter" an angel without being called nuts.

For example, have you ever narrowly escaped danger or even death? Perhaps you or someone who heard about your incident (or near-incident) may have made a comment like:

"looks like your guardian angel was doing his job"
"someone up there must like you"
"someone must be watching out for you"

Of course, they are referring to our heavenly pals, the angels.

Now you know these topics I write about are not typically religious in nature...and angels aren't necessarily tied to any particular organized religion. They are certainly more spiritual and supernatural in nature, and many people who believe in angels would not openly consider themslves to be "religious" people.

Here's something fun you can do. Will it prove to you whether angels exist? I don't know. I'm not here to "make you" believe anything. that's not what success is all about. I'm just here to offer alternative views.

It's up to you to try it on and see what fits.

So first let me ask you: is there any conflict in your life? No, seriously, stop laughing. Think about a specific conflict you are currently having with another person. Maybe you're on the outs with the boss. Maybe you can't get along with your in-laws. Maybe your neighbor is ticking you off on a daily basis. Pick one conflict and one relationship and think about it for a minute.

Now, take out a sheet of paper and write (don't type, don't email...there is something unique that happens when we physically write something down...I won't go into specifics here, but you can learn more about it here.) Write a letter to the guardian angel of that person. Tell them what you want (think: "Highest Good") and ask for harmony and swift resolution of the situation.

HEre's a sample....let's assume the neighbor's dog poops in your yard, adn the neighbor ("Bob") doesn't use a pooper scooper. This infuriates you, and you could write this:

Dear Guardian Angel of Bob,
As you know, Bob takes his dog to poop in my yard every day. This really upsets me, and I get mad at Bob. I have asked Bob to pick up the doggy poop, but he laughs and ignores me. I am asking for your assistance and intervention in this matter. Please help us find some common ground on this issue, and help us find harmony, especially in this season of Christmas. Dear Angel, please bless Bob, and his dog, and my house, and my family. Please find an amicable solution for us all. Thank you very much for your assistance in this matter.
Sincerely,
Your Name

Now fold up the letter and put it away and watch what happens.

I can't predict what will happen, only that the matter will get resolved. Perhaps Bob moves. Perhaps he suddenly decides to take the dog to poop on someone else's lawn. Perhaps he buys a pooper scooper. Perhaps the dog dies and Bob decides to get a fish instead. Maybe you'll get transfered and move into a bigger house, away from Bob and inconsiderate neighbors. It's impossible to tell what or how, but the matter will be resolved for the highest good of everyone concerned.

Trust me, it works.

You don't even have to believe it works, but it works.

Just avoid blaming anyone in the letter, and bless everyone in the letter (and MEAN it) and be open to a solution, whatever that may be. And watch what happens when you ask for divine help from above....

Here's your ??? of the day:

What can YOUR guardian angel do for you today? Are you willing to ask for help to get what you want?

P.S. for a fun and interesting movie that offers a different perspective on angels, check out Dogma. If you're Catholic, you simply MUST see this movie.

Are You Slipping?

Faithful followers of my success blog may have noticed that I skipped a couple of days in the past week. You may also have noticed that I inadvertently posted teh same message 2 days in a row. You may be wondering if I'm slipping.

Perhaps I'm getting lazy because it's the Christmas season.
Maybe I slacked off because I was up in Whistler, B.C. having a blast.
Maybe I'm just getting bored with teh whole blog thing.

Or maybe it's a little of all of the above.

Yes, I definitely noticed myself slacking off in a number of areas during this Whistler trip.

And it's not entirely for the reasons you might think.

While it's true that it IS indeed Christmastime, and while it's true that skiing and partying are way more fun than my daily routine, and while it's certainly true that it can get tough to find somehting interesting to write about day in and day out, it's really not because of any of those things.

It's because of alcohol.

Yep, you heard me. While away on this trip, I really got hammered one night and well, I suppose I'm not as young as I used to be because it really hit me hard.

In fact, several days have gone by and I still don't quite feel like myself.

Apparently, one heavy night of partying can set me back several days. I'd be wise to rememebr that the next time I want to stay out drinking and dancing until 4 in the morning. Sure, it was fun, but was it worth it?

And I wasn't the only one slipping, either. My darling hubby took a nasty spill down the mountain while skiing (these rental skis were some SMOKIN Saloman's I tell ya) and busted up his face a little. And he was stone-cold sober, too. But going a little fast down a slightly icy mountain - a dangerous combination.

How about you? Are you slipping?

This is certainly the season for indulging, living on teh edge and eating and drinking more than usual. Have you got a plan to keep the extra holiday pounds and morning-after feelings at bay this year? If not, you'd better get crackin, as Christmas will be here before you know it.

I also feel like I'm slipping a litle with my holiday preparedness. I'd like to use Hurricane Katrina as an excuse, but that's probably wearing a little thin now that it's been 3 months (and 2 months since we moved cross-crountry to Colorado). Normally, I have all my shopping done by eraly November. Not so this year!

Time to get crackin for me, how about you?

Here;s your question of the day:
What one thing can you do today to get prepared for the holidays? Will you take action and get it done today, or will you procrastinate yet another day? Go for it!

Living the Lifestyle

There are definitely perqs that come with success. Ask any successful people adn they'll agree.

For example, rightnow, I am writing you from my suite at the Chateau Fairmont in Whistler, British Columbia. By far one of hte most beautiful cold-weather climate places I've seen. The people here are phenomenally helpful, gracious and friendly. Go Canada, eh?

The accomodations are very nice - we upgraded to a suite, which is perfect since our toddler is with us. Here we are, hobnobbing with self-made millionaires adn learning how to further grow our wealth. Plus getting a little skiing and partying in, too of course.

If it sounds like the life you've imagined for yourself, why aren't you living it right now? You know success is a choice - we've already covered that topic a number of times. So why don't you choose it?

There could be a number of reasons...
- deservability
- misconceptions about money
- haven't found the right financial vehicle yet
- unsupportive circumstances
- or a milloin other reasons

but if this is what you truly want, then this is what you can have! Just make the choice to have it and take massive action, and the rest will fall into place.

And then maybe i'll see you this summer in beautiful South Africa??? I am DEFINITELY looking forward to that one!

untilthen, here's your question of hte day:
What exactly are you waiting for? what steps can you take TODAY to move you closer to your goals??

Living the Lifestyle

There are definitely perqs that come with success. Ask any successful people adn they'll agree.

For example, rightnow, I am writing you from my suite at the Chateau Fairmont in Whistler, British Columbia. By far one of hte most beautiful cold-weather climate places I've seen. The people here are phenomenally helpful, gracious and friendly. Go Canada, eh?

The accomodations are very nice - we upgraded to a suite, which is perfect since our toddler is with us. Here we are, hobnobbing with self-made millionaires adn learning how to further grow our wealth. Plus getting a little skiing and partying in, too of course.

If it sounds like the life you've imagined for yourself, why aren't you living it right now? You know success is a choice - we've already covered that topic a number of times. So why don't you choose it?

There could be a number of reasons...
- deservability
- misconceptions about money
- haven't found the right financial vehicle yet
- unsupportive circumstances
- or a milloin other reasons

but if this is what you truly want, then this is what you can have! Just make the choice to have it and take massive action, and the rest will fall into place.

And then maybe i'll see you this summer in beautiful South Africa??? I am DEFINITELY looking forward to that one!

untilthen, here's your question of hte day:
What exactly are you waiting for? what steps can you take TODAY to move you closer to your goals??

It's the Thought That Counts

So have you frantically started shopping for Christmas gifts yet? Yeah, me neither.
It's funny, I used to have a distinct Christmas pattern.

Every year, I would begin making my Christmas list in about August. I'd start shopping in about October, and I'd be done by Thanksgiving. Yeah, I know. Insane,right? But I always figured it was more insane to be frantically rushing about at the last minute, grabbing anything that seemed halfway decent.

I don't care for crowds. I especially hate to stand in line for anything. I will forgo a bathroom for an extra HOUR if it means I won't have to stand in line. I'm not a fan of holiday traffic, insufficient parking spaces, or disgruntled cashiers. So I like to beat the Christmas rush. It's probably the two years I spent working in retail during college. That alone is enough to make you hate Christmas.

Of course, shopping online is a dream come true for people like me right? Except that I really love to touch things before I buy them. It's a tactile thing, I suppose. So I don't do a lot of online shopping for gifts for other people (unless of course it's something I've already seen and touched for myself in a store somewhere!)

This year, I have a whole different view on Christmas.

After Hurricane Katrina, everything is different.

This year, my entire family will be together for Christmas, for the first time in I can't tell you how long. Oh yeah, it's gonna be different allright. And my folks have decided to get out of their house (a decision that was a long time in the making, which Katrina helped expedite, thankfully!) and build in the country, on my sister and brother-in-law's property. Great news all around.

So I find myself putting even more thought than usual into my Christmas list this year.

I don't think about what would look good on the person, what they mentioned that they wanted, or what their favorite color is.

I don't worry about the price.

I don't worry about shipping (after all, I'll be bringing them with me, personally!)

This year, there's only 1 question to consider, the one driving force behind all my seasonal purchases this year:

What is the most meaningful gift I can give this person?

That question is the same for you - while you're doing your Christmas shopping. Let me know how it all works out.

It's All in the Asking

You know the old adage, "Ask and you shall receive." Sure, everyone's heard that one.

And yet it seems that nearly every day I talk to someone who wants something, but won't ask for it. Many of these "won't ask" cases are (unfortunately) women.

But how often could we HAVE what we DESIRE if we could only muster the courage to ASK ?

For example, as many of you know, I just released The Success Method. Someone recently asked me "Amy, how did you get that celebrity endorsement from Joe Vitale?"

They were pretty surprised when I told them: "I asked."

Sure, it's surprising. We convince ourselves that getting what we want must be difficult. We tell oursevels we have to "earn it." It's the same reason so many financially successful people once struggled horribly. Joe Vitale himself was actually HOMELESS many years ago. As was Andy Andrews. And many more.

Was I intimidated asking Dr. Joe Vitale to review The Success Method? OF course I was! That nagging voice, crying out "What? Little ol' me?" But I had to get a grip and remember the Big Me that has great things to accomplish here. The Big Me told the little me to "take a hike!"

After all, what is the worst Joe could have done? Only about 4 things the way I see it:

1. He could laugh at me (well, not really because I was emailing him. It's hard to laugh at someone in an email, even with "lol.")

2. He could ignore me (which he did at first, except that I kept emailing him every couple of days, because I knew if I was persistent, he would finally at least answer me, even if it was to tell me to bugger off).

3. He could tell me to bugger off. Which I really didn't expect, since I've read his books and I'm on his emial lists and honestly, I almost feel like I know the guy. Your gut feeling will always tell you the truth about someone, and mine was good about this dude.

4. He could agree to take a look at it. Which he did, of course!

And I was totally prepared to accept options 1-3 knowing that ASKing was hte only possible way I could get to option #4.

Heck, I was even nervous when I shipped him a copy. That nagging little voice again...."What if he hates it? What if he tells me it's the worst thing he ever saw? That I couldn't expect to sell it for a nickel?"

Once again, it took courage for me to insist that the Big Me silence the little me. And Big Me prevailed.

I reminded myself that this was inspired work. Creating something that will make a difference in people's lives is NEVER crap - regardless of how it may look. Any inspired action is put forth with purpose, and destined to succeed if it's creator will only persist to its fruition. I even reviewed The Success Method myself, which reminded me how wonderfully inspired it is.

Adn sure enough, I get this glowing review from the Great Joe Vitale.

Some would call me lucky. Fortunate. Blessed. But as I've said many times, we CREATE our own luck. If I had never asked, I would never know. And The Success Method site would certainly be less powerful.

So think about this...

What do you want that you are afraid to ask for? If you WERE to ask, what are all the possible outcomes of your asking? Are you willing to risk that any or all of those outcomes could happen? What are you waiting for? Go for it!

The Environment of Success

We hear a lot of talk today about "taking care of the environment" and being "stewards of the environment." Apparently these are buzzwords that get attention in political elections.

Too bad we're not talking about the environment that really matters.

We have talked previously in this post about choosing your friends carefully, but what about choosing your surroundings with the same amount of care?

How's your working environment? If you're like many people, you feel trapped in a highly-negative work environment. Even if you enjoy the kind of work you do, you may be stuck spending 8 hours a day (or more) with people who can't appreciate anything and are constantly complaining.

My background is in healthcare management, and that has got to be one of hte most negative environments a person can choose to work in. Think about it: most of your customers (patients) are sick. They feel terrible, many are scared, and they are also worried about "What's this gonna cost me?" No one wants to pay for good medical care. It's not like buying a new car or a fun gadget - it's more like a bill or a necessary utility.

So all (most) of your customers are already in a bad mood.

Many of the physicians are no better. Sure, they smile and are polite while you're in their office (mostly because they can't afford to lose any patients) but many physicians are just miserable. (Keep in mind, I'm talking about clinics and hospitals - smaller-town private practices do not necessarily fit this description.)

A lot of physicians became doctors so they could solve problems and help people.

Unfortunately, primary care physicians are so bombarded wiht paperwork, new government regulations related to your privacy and safety (imposed by government beaurocrats who do not really understand your wants or needs as a patient), confusing billing practices, mandatory continuing education, and the need to cram in more patients in less time so the business can be profitable. Many young doctors just don't realize what they were signing up for when they started out with their lofty and idyllic desire to be a trusted physician. Older physicians shake their head in resigned frustration to see what the industry has become. It isn't pretty.

With the rising cost of healthcare, the confusing and often unethical practices of health insurance companies, and the litigious society creating outrageous malpractice suits, being in healthcare just ain't what it used to be. THe money's not there, the patient connection is limited, and the paperwork is monstrous.

Which doesn't help to put your medical employees in a good mood. What do they have to be happy about anyway? They are overworked and underpaid and they get beat up on from both ends - patients who had to wait, don't have their insurance card, didn't get teh papers signed that they needed, don't have their prescription, etc. And the physicians who have to put on a happy face in front of the patients, but often turn into a different person behind closed doors.

Like I said, it's a pretty negative environment to be in.

How easy do you think it was for me to remain positive and upbeat in an environment like that?

But here's the thing: that is the environment THAT I CHOSE. It was entirely my choice to go to work there. I have an MBA and could work anywhere. But once I got into health care and got some experience there, it seemed like my only option. Any of this sounding familiar?

Eventually, a life change (the birth of my daughter) caused me to re-evaluate my priorities and I decided to start my own business to get oyt of the JOB.

What a difference that made!

/suddenly, I had chosen a different environment, and viva le difference as the french say.

Forgive my terrible French, I should have brushed up before coming here to beautiful Whistler, B.C. But that's ok, eveyrone speaks english anyway!

Whistler is near Vancouver, adn man, is it gorgeous here. The people are amazingly nice and warm and the skiing today was pretty good too. What a great place. The Chateau Fairmont is stunningly beautiful adn we have breathtaking views outside our bedroom. We are having a blast. Which means I gotta run, because we have dinner plans...

Here is your question du jour:

If you know that you are able to choose your environment, is the environment you are in RIGHT NOW the one you would choose? If not, what are you waiting for? You only have to stay in a negative environment as long as you choose to do so....

Now Appearing in the New York Times...

Did I tell you we were in the New York Times recently?

Well, not US so much as our HOUSE.

Yep, our house was recently in the New York times. Color photo and everything. A reporter did a story on the New Orleans real estate market and how it's primed to bounce back (and we HAVE had a lot of interest in our house, although it hasn't sold yet).

I'll attach a pic when we get back home.

And here's your question of the day:

What are you hanging on to, that you'd be best served to release? What actions can you take today to begin to release it?

On the Road Again...

After a couple of peaceful months of settling into our new home, it's time to hit the road again. This time we're headed to beautiful Whistler, British Columbia.

This is my first trip to Canada, so I'm pretty excited about it. I'm attending a wealth-building conference at the Chateau Fairmont Whistler. Pretty shee-shee, from what I understand. I'll update you from the resort when we get there.

No matter how far in advance I start preparing for a trip, it seems there is always last-minute stress. Why is that, exactly?

After all, going somewhere as beautiful as Whistler should be exciting, but not stressful. Yet there is always so much to do and there seems to be so little time in which to get it done.

But I suppose that's lack-thinking. After all, we are given a finite amount of time on this earth, adn how we spend it is entirely up to us. In a way, we have unlimited time if we look at it that way.

And yet, I must end this post, as I have last-minute packing to do, and you don't even want to know what time I have to get up tomorrow morning. (Let's just say teh sun won't even be THINKING about coming up by the time I'm getting in my limo to the airport. Yikes.)

Good night!

Don't Forget Your Goodies

I decided to take a break from my usual rantings today and give my readers some goodies. After all, it IS the season for giving...

Here's what I've got for you today:

A totally complimentary brand-new program called Go Gratitude: The Master Key.

A friend just told me about it yesterday. It's a worldwide experiment to assist people in recognizing and experiencing gratitude everywhere in their lives. No catch, no sales pitch, just a freee 42-day program with daily reminder emails (which of course you can unsubscribe to at any time). At least go check it out and see what you might be missing.

Now that you're feeling all warm and fuzzy, I'll throwanother log on the fire. Would you like your life to be a little simpler this holiday?

Would you like someone to show you exactly how you can do that, without a lot of 'fluff' and nonsense?

Would you like to assimilate thisinformation and these habits into your life in less than 15 minutes a day?

Would you like to get all this greatinformation at absolutely ZERO cost to you?

I thought so. Here you go.

And as if Christmas wasn't coming early enough this year with all the gifts I'm handing out, here's one more for ya. As you know, my new product The Success Method is creating quite a buzz.

Even Joe Vitale himself had quite a bit to say about it (you can see his comments here.)

But did you know that I am giving away over 400 bucks in free bonuses when you purchase The Success Method? For a limited time, of course. There are some goodies in this batch that'll have yourstockin' rockin' for sure.

You'll also get a bonus from yours truly when you buy Mark Joyner's new book The Irrestistable Offer. The list of "bribes" is ridiculous - mine is about 4th from the bottom - "The Secret Pie."

And YES, it's ok for you to share these goodies with your pals.

HEre's your question for today:

What do you have to be thankful for, right now, in this moment?